She interrupts me. I interrupt her. Elle A. Muse is unfortunately not amused…
Seeing as my buddy, my pal, my lifelong friend (and most excellent critique partner, or “cp” as we like to call each other) Kate St. James doesn’t have a blog (for shame!), I promised to pass this along for her.
Kate’s blogging in the contemporary area of RomConInc today! And giving away a copy of Secrets 28: SENSUAL CRAVINGS, which includes her most excellent erotic romance novella, Kiss Me at Midnight.
Leave a comment for Kate at RomCon for your chance to win!
By Shobhan Bantwal
Author of THE SARI SHOP WIDOW and other novels about India
Despite my nearly 36-year-old arranged marriage and my conservative childhood in small-town India, I’m a hopeless romantic. Surprised? Why else would I write books that most people think of as “Bollywood in a Book,” stories bubbling with drama, emotion, colorful characters, rich cultural elements, and most importantly romance?
Contrary to popular western belief, modern Indian arranged marriages are indeed rooted in mutual liking and respect. Most couples have the choice of rejecting each other if they take an instant dislike or have serious doubts about a future together.
I firmly believe it is possible to have romance in a relationship built on a practical foundation. In fact, when parents of potential brides and grooms do a lot of discreet research before finding suitable mates for their children, they invariably choose someone with similar tastes, family values, and compatible economic and social backgrounds.
When there is so much going for a couple, not to mention support from both families, the chances of a smooth transition from single to married status are likely to be very high. Adjusting to someone who has so much in common with oneself is easier, and so is the potential for falling in love.
Many seem to view arranged marriage as a quaint and antiquated custom of two strangers hopping blindly into a loveless union forced by their elders. Nonetheless, from personal experience as well as the experiences of my near and dear ones, I can safely say arranged love is a safe kind of love that may be slow to ignite, mature, and stabilize, but it is an abiding love that often lasts a lifetime. I call it “arranged love.”
Statistics have proved that arranged marriages have a much higher survival rate. Besides, isn’t every marriage or long-term relationship a gamble to some degree, no matter which way the partners meet? I have to confess though, that my fiction is vastly different from my personal life. In my stories, the hero and heroine fall in love and at times go against society’s dictates.
I would love to hear your thoughts on arranged love. Do you think there is some merit to this archaic concept, and is it conducive to romance, or is it a recipe for disaster?
***
Leave a comment or question for Shobhan to enter to win THE SARI SHOP WIDOW. If you’re reading Shobhan’s post through a feed on Facebook, Goodreads, or another social network, please visit the comment trail at Muse Interrupted to be eligible for the draw.
To read Shobhan’s bio and the back cover blurb for THE SARI SHOP WIDOW, please see yesterday’s post. To learn more about Shobhan and her books, check out her website.
Tomorrow women’s fiction author Shobhan Bantwal visits the blog! Shobhan’s blogging about romance in arranged marriages and is giving away a copy of THE SARI SHOP WIDOW, her September 2009 from Kensington Publishing.
About THE SARI SHOP WIDOW:
Pungent curry, sweet fried onions, incense, colorful beads, lush fabrics. Shobhan Bantwal’s compelling new novel is set on the streets of Edison, New Jersey’s Little India, where a young businesswoman rediscovers the magic of love and family…
About Shobhan:
Shobhan Bantwal calls her writing Bollywood in a Book, commercial fiction about India, women’s issues & socio-political topics, with romantic & cultural elements. Her articles have appeared in Romantic Times, The Writer, India Abroad, Little India, New Woman, and India Currents. Her short fiction has won awards/honors in contests by Writer’s Digest, New York Stories, and New Woman magazines. Her debut book, THE DOWRY BRIDE, won the 2008 Golden Leaf Award.
Visit Shobhan’s website to learn more about her and her books!
I received my RITA books to judge today, and I’m a happy camper. Last year was my first year to judge, and I was sent 9 books. This year I was only sent 6 books. That’s much more manageable. Last year, even though I signed up to judge 3 categories, I received 8 books from one category. Not an ideal situation. This year, I have books from 3 categories, and some are different categories than I judged last year, so I’m greatly looking forward to it.
I’ll dig in this weekend. I’ve ordered my new computer, but it won’t be here for two weeks. I also ordered a netbook as a belated birthday present from My Liege. He wanted to take me to an electronics store and help me pick one out, but I already knew what I wanted and it was just so easy to buy the netbook while ordering the new tower. I got a better deal by ordering both from the same supplier, too.
Now M.L. has to go out and buy me a little something extra, because it’s just not right that I should buy a birthday present for myself. Aren’t I clever?
I’m back to editing the requested full manuscript. Today I’m on Youngest Son’s laptop. Yesterday, I was on M.L.’s. Y.S. has Word 2007, so I’m experiencing a learning curve, that’s for sure.
It’s official—my computer is dead! Delbert needs a new hard drive (on top of the virus issues which first sent him to the shop), and now that Windows 7 is out (Delbert had XP), My Liege and I decided it’s time I get a new tower. I don’t need a monitor, speakers, etc., so it shouldn’t be too much damage. The cost of replacing the hard drive is too high to seriously consider for a 5-year-old computer.
So now I’m researching new towers while continuing editing/polishing the requested full manuscript on M.L.’s or Youngest Son’s laptops. The computer dying lost me a good two days on the manu request, which was further complicated by the fact that I went to Mexico to celebrate a milestone birthday in the company of my parents. I had a wonderful time and just returned Friday night. Will post pictures once I have my new computer. I’ll probably get another Dell. This will make our second Dell desktop purchase and we’ve also made two Dell laptop purchases in the past. M.L.’s job offers a discount that is usually too good to pass up. The computer techs who looked at my hard drive told me they see the fewest hardware failures on Dell above all other brands (no, they don’t sell them), so that gives me good incentive to be a repeat customer.
In Mexico, I was able to check on my email using my father’s laptop, but somehow couldn’t find time to research Delbert replacements or work on the requested manu in nice, sunny weather. Instead, I read a ton of books, spent quality time with the ‘rents, and visited an out-of-the-way beach (IOW, not the beaches in front of the hotels). I haven’t gone somewhere in the winter for 13 years, so it was a nice change. Unfortunately, M.L. had to stay home for business considerations, and it was a good thing he did. The weather is wreaking havoc in my part of the continent, alternately freezing and melting. We had a huge melt while I was gone, and M.L. spent my birthday attempting to protect our basement from flooding. He did a great job, but the old detached garage that houses his motorcycle suffered some damage. Better that than our house!
If he had gone to Mexico with me, I can’t imagine what a mess the basement would have been in when we got home.
Anyway, this is my convoluted way of saying that I’ll be scarce on-line until I have my new computer all set up and files transferred, programs loaded, etc. I do have a guest blogger visiting next week, and luckily I scheduled her posts before I left. So that guest blog and book give-away will still go ahead. I won’t be visiting blogs, etc., myself until I’m on my own computer again, but I promise I’ll catch up with my blog and Twitter and Facebook (Scrabble!) friends when I can.
Popping in to say I’m kind of here…in some format. I’m in the midst of editing/polishing a full manuscript request, which has been made more difficult by a pleasant circumstance and also a very unpleasant one—my computer is “deaded,” as Allie McBeagle would say. I’m posting from a borrowed laptop. You’ll all have to carry on without me. More on the pleasant circumstance when Delbert (the computer) recovers. Please keep him in your thoughts. :::sob:::