My 2007 Golden Heart finalist book, WHERE SHE BELONGS, won’t be out for another year. Except there’s another way to look at that. My Golden Heart finalist book will be out in a year! December 2011. It’s a long “engagement,” but the day WILL arrive.
Waiting for the release date reminds me of when My Liege and I got engaged. It was on the sixth anniversary of our first date (except we didn’t call them “dates” in the Eighties—Americans might have “dated,” but Canadians just “went out.”). (We also had a thing against cheerleaders). M.L. and I had a long engagement, about 15 months.
The night of the “one year countdown” to our wedding, I was attending a staff party with my BFF, Claudia, A.K.A. Sandorf Verster. Her staff party, not mine. We were sitting around a fire (it was summer), and she looked at me and said, “Procter, in one year you’ll be married. Only one more year of freedom.” (Or something like that). And she cackled. Like a witch.
I looked at my engagement ring, which had been a half-size too small when M.L. placed it on my finger in Stanley Park after a romantic dinner in downtown Vancouver, and it seemed to shrink again. I gulped. One year. One last year of unmarried life. Nerves ran rampant throughout my body. Then I thought, “What the hell,” and reminded Claudia that her chances of marrying before 30 were slim to slim (not that she cared).
As a release date approaches, writerly anxiety sets in. What if everyone hates my book? (What if the marriage doesn’t work out?)
What if everyone loves it? (What if we make it to our 25th? Oh, wait, we did, this summer).
What if people merely “like” the book? What if, what if, what if?
If you’re a writer, do you get nervous come release time? Or are you bubbling over with excitement? A neurotic mess? Overflowing with confidence?
If you’re not a writer, I’m not sure how to compare the release of a book to another life event. It’s weird to work on a book for months, sometimes years, strive for publication (which takes a cast-iron stomach, let me tell you), then suddenly an editor loves the story. She doesn’t think you suck! Twelve other editors before her might have thought you sucked, but THIS editor knows better! This editor is brilliant! YOU are brilliant! You are remarkably clever at fooling yourself, at any rate. And, not to worry, tomorrow you’ll think you’re the worst writer who ever existed.
Up and down, up and down. Being an author is an emotional roller-coaster. To survive, you need to embrace rejection. Whether that’s from editors, agents, or readers. Preferably readers you don’t personally “know.”
When I have a book release, I tell everyone I know, “Buy my book. You don’t have to read it. Just buy it and support me. Because Mama craves a new case of Kraft Dinner. If you hate the book, DON’T TELL ME. If you love it, or ‘enjoy’ it, by all means, tell me that! But if you hate it, just never mention having read it, and I won’t ask.”
There’s nothing worse than a well-meaning friend critiquing your book AFTER it’s been published. When it’s too late to do anything about it. Coming from a stranger? No problem. Having a buddy tell you your kid is ugly? Um, NO.
Cindy, I know what you’re going through. It’s scary to release your baby for all the world to see. And it doesn’t get easier, even when you get great reviews for the first book. Then you worry that the next book might not live up to it. And now, for my third book, I’m worrying that it might not live up to the previous two books. lol I wonder if it ever stops?
I don’t think it ever does, Edie! I feel a bit more “hidden” when one of Penny’s books releases, because, although I have Easter eggs on my site to show my link to her, I haven’t outright outted her as me. She’s doing well when it comes to reviews, though. Sometimes I sorta envy her!!
So far, I haven’t given much thought to what anyone thinks of my books, because I wrote the first two for fun and I know they have a limited audience (most people I know personally don’t care for the hot stuff. Oh, well!). The one that was just contracted, though, is close to my heart and I’m going to care. Not looking forward to that, but I am looking forward to having something out there I’m completely proud of. And phooey on those who disagree!
Yay for the one-year countdown!
Thanks, Avery. And you should feel completely proud of all your books. There’s nothing wrong with your earlier writing!
Well, no, but at some point I started writing for the “market” instead of taking my stories where I wanted to go. I see it when I go back and look at old (unpubbed) stuff. Blah. I feel better now. 🙂
Avery, I’m glad you feel better about the direction of your writing now.
Yes, it’s a tough balance between writing for a specific market and writing for where you personally want the stories to go. I do understand that, becase I have a book waiting for revisions that I wrote for a specific market and then attempted to revise to a different specific market (a specific line within a specific publishing house, and the line has very specific needs), 😉 that I can now revise to truly reflect my interpretation of the characters as opposed to the best interpretation of the characters according to what I’m guessing or have been told the editors of that specific line want. LOL. Confused yet? I know I’m going small press/epub with this particular book, and I’m okay with that, as it allows a certain degree of freedom that writing for a specific editor for a specific line for a specific house does not. 🙂
Congratulations on selling your Golden Heart manuscript! WTG! I look forward to hearing more about the ‘engagement’ during the upcoming year. 🙂
Thanks, Gail!