Things I’m Not Good At

  1. Putting on fake eyelashes. I wound up with glue inside my eye, on my lids, on my hands. And a fake eyelash smeared across my eyelid. Could not reposition it properly, no matter what I tried. Had to scrub eye with about 1/2 cup of eye makeup remover and then just go for three coats of mascara instead.
  2. Applying fake fingernails. Every time I’ve tried buying fake fingernails for a costume, I can’t even get them to stick. But this time I went to an expert! The lady at the cosmetics counter. She assured me the fake nails I bought would stick, and did they ever. I had to get someone else to put them on. Then help me paint them. Then trim them. Then trim them again. Because I couldn’t pick up a darn thing. But at least they lasted the night, unlike the eyelashes, which didn’t make it to the party.
  3. Removing fake fingernails. I had to swirl my fingers for ten minutes each in this little jar with a scrubby thing inside. Then, over the next day, I had to continue peeling off the remnants. The real nails underneath were not pleased.
  4. I’ve realized I’m really not good at posing as a world-famous author. Instead, I seem to feel obligated to channel Count Dracula’s wife. In my defense, my character was named Gothika, famous for a series titled Legion of the Doomed or something, My Liege was dressed as a vampire bartender, and we were attending a Mardi Gras-themed murder mystery party. He rubbed off on me.

Things I’m Good At:

  1. Getting into (my version of the) character.
  2. Making a fool of myself.
  3. Yes, even with a crew of 17-22 year-olds. My dh and I were the oldest at the murder mystery party.
  4. Giving away the villain. The lawyer did it. Just happened to be Eldest Son.
  5. Having fun!